They think if we could turn on the whole world on to surfing 3 fat people who don’t surf will get rich beyond there dreams and spent the rest of their years drinking taking drugs and spending the money on hookers. While the rest of us will wallow amongst the masses of kooks and praise the brains behind the not so brilliant idea that everyone should take up surfing. The TV rights can be given to some low-grade network and we can listen what dorky commentators say to convince us to sit on our ass all day watching 3 ft Trestles. So the powers that be have struggled to come up with a format for surfing that is entertaining to the mid west and will have them coming back for more.
Well back in 1967 they came up with the perfect formula in the episode of Batman where he has the surf off with The Joker at Gotham point.It was fun and ridiculous and entertaining and they both wore great custom outfits that made them easy to distinguish. Now this was the really fun-loving joker Cesar Romero not the sinister dark Heath Ledger variety,you remember purple suit, green shorts, green hair ,green board splendid combination. Then you got the Batman on his yellow board he surfed in his cape and kept his boots on and wore his shorts incredibly high,they were held up by the bat utility belt these are the sort of things people want to see, like what gadgets does John John have in his Hurley internationals nothing I bet how boring.
So their on the beach GOOD verse EVIL so whats at stake, chaos and anarchy on the streets and maybe a good time if The Joker comes out ahead, or law and order up held and the good people of the world saved so they can continue to work 10 hour days and enjoy 25 yr mortgages and weekend trips to the mall. As you can see it was nail-biting and had everyone on the edge of there sofa at home this was important shit about to happen on TV.
Well as we all know The Joker ripped all over The Bat and got well and truly ripped off and was pissed with the final decision by the judges. The Batman won on a technicality due to a shark interfering and having some maze on hand to take control of the situation. It was great it was entertainment and lasted 2 and a half minutes which is about right amount to time to keep a non surfers interested. The inland masses think of the beach as a good time and chicks in bikinis and beer, unless they ASP want to throw in nudity or bikini girls and sharks which they are loathed to do the masses will consider it a boring activity.
So that’s it keep it short, keep it entertaining, have goodies and baddies, dress them up so they are easy to identify add sharks to the mix for a little more suspense and you got yourself a surf contest worth watching. Then the audience can go back to reruns of Baywatch like they were doing before the were so rudely interrupted.